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This is the kind of people HMRC has working for it

You would figure that with Her Majesty’s Revenue & Customs employing an expert on committing tax avoidance, they would know how to stop it.

Well to be fair, former tax adviser David Heaton has parted ways with the taxman after it was discovered that he’s been telling people how to get around paying their fair share to his employer for, well for quite some time. Mr Heaton, who was originally hired on by HMRC to work on an advisory panel to help out root out instances of tax avoidance and tax evasion, somehow managed to leave out the part where just two months prior to joining he had been charging people £1,000 a head to attend a seminar where he revealed the secrets of keeping their money out of the ‘grubby mitts’ of the chancellor.

I’m pretty sure the sound you heard was every dictionary in the UK spontaneously replacing the text on the entry reading ‘irony’ with just a picture of good Mr Heaton. Either that or it was Chancellor Osborne’s head exploding in impotent rage. Needless to say Mr Heaton ‘resigned’ his position recently, though the arrogant bastard had the stones to say that he ‘never advocated’ the use of aggressive tax avoidance.

Of course, the photographic evidence of Mr Heaton talking about how to get around tax payments says otherwise – and so does his flippant, disrespectful speech recorded in secret documenting his utter stupidity. I swear this is absolutely mad – we’ve got tax advisers that have actually counselled their clients, in detail, how to weasel out of their tax liabilities actually being paid by the Government to help them figure out how to stamp out tax avoidance.

Is it any wonder that we’re completely and utterly screwed when it comes to accountancy problems such as these? We’re going to get absolutely nowhere as long as these arrogant, pigheaded bastards are the ones telling us officially how to catch other arrogant, pigheaded bastards. For what it’s worth, it seems like there’s not one honest accountant left in this country, or at least not one that the Government knows about.

Perhaps HMRC is looking in the wrong place for tax advisers? You know the taxman might have better luck staying away from industry bigwigs and instead going with a humble, hard-working, and honest contractor accountant instead. Wouldn’t that be nice for a change?

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